When I was reading the various comments made by people who responded to my survey, a few people were clear that they were having less sex than they used to. One person indicated that they miss sex quite a lot, and another reported having hardly any since their diagnosis. A comment was made by one that their partner no longer desires them. This got me thinking a bit more, and I'm minded to ask more questions about sex and relationships in a future survey.
I also note that the topic of sex and disability doesn't feature much in the media, and so I bought a copy of the book: A Quick and Easy Guide to Sex and Disability, by A Andrews. I wanted to understand more, and in the usual way, share this understanding with you readers!
The book is a cartoon book, and in the first few pages you find out that the author is a paraplegic cartoonist, that has sex! They write the book with the aim of ditching the question "how can disabled bodies have sex" and replace it with "how can disabled folk have more enjoyable sex". They note that society does not really discuss sex and disability, and present three myths: 'disabled people aren't attractive', 'disabled people don't care about things like sex', and 'disabled people cant perform sex.' - identifying that the things people say can impact on wellbeing.
They start by covering communication - firstly communicating with yourself, and then goes on to give ideas about how you may want to try communicating, noting that this can be hard to do. The remainder of the book goes into some of the more practical points which can occur when having sex with a disability. The conclusion is that sex is whatever you want it to be, and the possibilities are endless.
I like the information presented here, and it is presented in a very friendly, matter-of-fact way, allowing you to see many perspectives and help you form your own view. The cartoons in the book present a wide range of disabilities, and also a wide range of people - capturing the diversity of the human race in a very nice way!
